Tuesday, November 6, 2007

How to say goodbye to your best friend.

When hes a dog and doesn't know plain english?

My dog is my best friend... I have many best friends, My husband Dave, My faithful Kris, My friends Tara, and Becki..


But my best constant always by my side friend is My dog Bear. We are homies, soulmates... yes hes a dog, but I love him so much, Hes NOT like my child... I hear a lot of people talk of there pets like they are another child... Bear isn't like that to me, Hes my dogself, one of my girlfriends and one of my pastors or counselors, hes a little bit my brother and a little bit my father.

He is NOT just my dog, he is my friend, he is in part why I get up everyday and smile, he has taught me so much!

He is kinder then I am, more patient then any adult I have ever met, I know he is wiser then I am. and he is gentle and decent and constant.

When everything is shitty, when my day just isn't what I had hoped, I have Bear, always there, to look at me, The soul and understanding in his eyes is so strong.

Bear does have his weak points, but they are far and few, I can meet someone with 10 x the flaws and like them greatly, so the match Bear and I have, is more then dog and owner, its friendship, tried and true and soulship.

I have been trying to come up with words to tell my family that our beloved Bear, our best friend and our faithful brother is dying.

No words come to me.... Just pain in my heart, I can't imagine my life without Bear in it. The fact is that we have been truly blessed and fortunate to have him as long as we have. 12 years is a long long time for a dog his size to be around. Soon he won't be here and I will have to find a way to carry on. I know I will, I know that time is what it will take. And the thought of him with me inside my heart. But DAMNIT! I don't want him to go.. I want to be selfish and hold on to him and not let him leave me!

I look at him this morning as he can't seems to walk, I watch him drag himself to my side, everywhere I go, he comes crawling to me. Still so constant even when his back legs don't want to move. He is in this for me... He is in this life to be with me, and I can look into his eyes and see his calm and know that he is more worried about me, then about him dying. Like he is saying "shh, just let it be, It always has to be, and it will be ok" actually he probably would have said something much prettier if he could speak people. But he gives me comfort even now.


So how to say goodbye to my bestfriend... I can't give him a steak... he won't eat it.

He will just have to settle for some love, some hugs and my tears.

Even dying he is going to be the one I need and not the other way around.



I love you Bear.
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4 comments:

MARIA EUGENIA said...

No, you can't say goodbye to your best friend. I understand every little word you say and I am in tears. I have Jollie as you have your Bear and she is 12 years old, being a Belgian Shepherd that is a lot too and I feed her as well as I feed myself in order to keep her longer with me. Cuddle your bear every day and you will always remember him and have him in your heart. Maria

Jennifer M said...

THank you! Bear is still hanging in there, But I can't help to think it won't be long.

Lee said...

Bear, you are so lucky to have a best friend like jennifer. If only she knew how much you love her. Only if she spoke doggie. Take as many hugs and kisses while you can.....

fishy said...

i just had to say goodbye to my best best friend and im in tears and that helped

thanks